hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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