32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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