so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Randomize
