So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Randomize
