I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
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