Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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