alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
