Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
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