I want to stick my p in your. b.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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