Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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