hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Sext me about skeletons
Randomize
