New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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