I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
If you had a good reason for throwing the toaster at the wall, now's a good time to tell someone. My parents are on their way back and you know my dad and his pop tarts.
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
