I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
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