What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
