so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It's official drugs can't kill me
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
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