I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
