she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize