i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
We need to get me chipped asap
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
