How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
Randomize