Capitaan dildo arrescate!
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
