garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
