Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
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