In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Randomize
