Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
