I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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