whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
