I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
