I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Are my feet made of real feet?
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Randomize
