bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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