why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
