Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
