It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
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