38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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