10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
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