There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
Randomize
