sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
