i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Randomize