We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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