honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
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