my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
i think i scared a bird with my dick
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
As shirtless as possible
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
