Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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