Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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