it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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