Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
