doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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