that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
