what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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