so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize