evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize