You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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