Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
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