I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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